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How to Give Your Boss Feedback!

Working closely with anyone gives you useful insight into her performance. This is especially true of your boss, who you likely see in a variety of settings: client meetings, presentations, one-on-ones, negotiations, etc. But even if that insight could be helpful to your boss, is it your place to share it with her? Could you be putting your job or your relationship at risk by telling her what you see or by giving her frank feedback? Giving your boss feedback, commonly called upward feedback, can be a tricky process to master. However, if offered correctly and thoughtfully, your insight can not only help your boss but also improve your working relationship.

What the Experts Say
John Baldoni, a leadership consultant, coach, and author of Lead Your Boss: The Subtle Art of Managing Up says that leadership is all about perception; if leaders do not know how they are perceived, their performance will suffer. However, the higher up in an organization a leader sits, the harder it is to get honest feedback. James Detert, Assistant Professor at the Cornell Johnson Graduate School of Management and author of the Harvard Business Review article Why Employees Are Afraid to Speak” and “Speaking Up to Higher-Ups: How Supervisors and Skip-Level Leaders Influence Employee Voice says, “Over-reliance on the chain of command prevents leaders from hearing the unvarnished truth.” Your input can help your boss see herself as others see her and help her to make critical adjustments in her behavior and approach. However, giving this type of feedback requires careful thought; here are some principles to keep in mind.

The relationship comes first
The ability to give and receive upward feedback, like any form of feedback, is dependent on the relationship between you and your boss. Without trust, the feedback will be impossible to receive. Before giving feedback, you need to gauge whether your boss will be open to what you have to say. If you know that your boss is unreceptive to feedback, is likely to react negatively, or if you have a rocky relationship, it’s better not to say anything. However, as Baldoni points out, “If your boss is open-minded and you have a good relationship, you owe him the straight talk.” As with any feedback, your intentions must be good and your desire to help your boss should supersede any issues you may have between you.

Wait to be invited, or ask to be invited?
Even if you have a great relationship, launching into unsolicited feedback is ill-advised. As Detert says, “General advice on how to be a better boss is tough to give unless you’re asked for it.” Ideally, your boss has asked for your input and made clear what would be helpful to her in terms of feedback. Your boss may disclose her development areas and ask you to keep an eye out for certain behaviors that she is working on. Baldoni says, “In a perfect world, it is a manager’s responsibility to make it safe to give feedback.”

However, Baldoni acknowledges that in the real world this may not always happen. If your boss does not directly request feedback, you can ask if she would like feedback. This is often most easily done in the context of a new project or new client. You can say something like “Would it be helpful to you for me to give you feedback at certain points in this project?” or “I’m likely to have a unique perspective on what we’re doing, would you like some feedback about how the project is going?” Again, these questions must be presented with the best of intentions. Since it is her job to give you feedback, avoid sounding like you want to give feedback in a vengeful way. Demonstrate your willingness to help her improve.

Focus on your perspective
It can be tempting when your boss is open to feedback, to imagine all the things you would do if you were in his position. However, your feedback should focus on what you are seeing or hearing, not what you would do as the boss. Baldoni recommends that you “frame feedback in form of your perceptions.” He suggests saying things such as “I noticed at that meeting that you came across as bullying.” By sharing your perspective you can help your boss to see how others are seeing him. This can be invaluable to a leader who may be disconnected from people in the lower ranks.

Focusing on your view also means realizing the limitations of your standpoint. You need to remember that you are seeing only a partial picture of your boss’s performance and you may not appreciate or realize the demands on him. Detert says, “Subordinates by and large don’t have a full appreciation of the reality of their bosses.” Give feedback that is reflective of what you can see and avoid presuming what he is faced with. Remember that good feedback rules still apply. Your feedback should be honest and data-driven. Open with affirmative feedback and give constructive feedback with suggestions for improvement. Avoid accusations. “People react much, much better to specifics than to generalities,” Detert says. So use details to back up your points.

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